My Blog

"this post is for my zee that loves clock soooooooo much as if it’s a
magic box.I hope you can do better than bunda in this time dealing
thing…..Ill try to teach you to be better than me with your unique
personality, not with mine…Cause you are different,and I am glad n
thankful for that"

If Allah gave u more time in one day…um…30 hours maybe, or…40 hours,will that be enough for you?
Can you still complain that you just need more time, or….I didn’t get the chance to do it today. All those lame excuses will be disappeared like a jinny, wush!!gone, gone, gone!
REALLY? I don’t think so….
Time is like the ultimate excuse to runaway from our responsibilities, our duties, our works,etc - etc.Blame it to time, it will never complain back to you!never charge back. Just sit there quietly,sssshhhhhhhhh…..then it saved you…again!
Ever said thanks to time because it saved you zillion billion time from…being fired, being accused, being dishonored, being killed maybe, hehehehe…? I never got that chance to do it (Oh my GOD!another lame excuse?)
But please Allah…I really need more time, to raise my preciouss one, to be a better mother, to be a good wife, to be an honorable member of society, to be a good n noble business owner, to be….a good moslemah. I still have lots of goals…that need time. How much more?Um….try to do my best.
Even for a little thing I can depend on time, like answering the question from my mom: "Did you raise and feed your son properly? He’s so skinny n small (ignoring the fact that he’s happy n healthy)?"……got confused on answering the questions,hum…let me think..I gave him asi, I fed him with nutritious good, I watch n plan what he ate,…I think I did my best,but maybe…. " Just need more time, mom….Ill try to make him fatter" (gee…can you believe that?). Instead of stood up with my own beliefs, I just put a white flag and hide behind that time excuse.and…waiting for a miracle that on one fine day my son will woke up with some additional lbs,magically. Blah….

    Woke up with bad headache this morning,and sneezed once,twice,and followed up by hudreds of sneezes.Ugh…I think I got a COLD.(wa…bad news).no need to b panic, Calm down, after sahur I can take common cold magic pills,and voila…after few hours of sleep(gee…),it will be magically disappeared.Case closed…
    7am,zee woke up, with bad cough and sneezed once,twice and…oh No…..NOT ANOTHER COLD ATTACK!!Bunda’s soooooo sad….and really wanted to keep him at home,but today I had appointments already with some people,there were some works that need to b done before weekend. So, bunda n zee went to zee’s school, after lecturing the caregiver about the medicine he should take for today..blah..blah…blah….bunda gave zee a goodbye kiss and assalamualaikum…But ‘hatchiiiiii",and another "hatchiiiii"…and "ugh ugh" (coughing sounds) are like a symphoni in that room. Oh my God, most of zee’s friends are sick…with fever,and cough and runny nose. DISASTER,DISASTER,my head was ringing like there was a telephone inside it.This will just make zee’s condition worst.Hm..11am,i duno what 2 do,so i told the caregiver to please please please take care of him, put him away from other kids (i actually felt bad about this one,is it too demanding?).
11.05am…I cried because I had to leave him there when he wasn’t feel ing well. Maybe the only thing that he need is only me, his bunda. I hope he knew that I love him always and my heart is always b with him…
4.15pm…finally all my works 4 tday are done,finished,taken care…i ran to my car and went to pick up my preciouss one. He ran to me as soon as I showed up on the door,he hugged me for a long time…How are you prince?feelin’ any better?. So you didn’t catch fever today (Alhamdulillah), you ate all of your meals (Alhamdulillah),and drank 4 bottles of milk (Alhamdulillah).Please keep strong for bunda nak…Ill try my best to be your mother,to be the person that you can count on,that you can respect and always have the shoulder to "go home" to.
5pm…the tape in the car was on, it was cat steven’s muslil children song. "who should I gave my love to?my mind to?my respect to after Allah and Rasulullah?…comes your mother,next..your mother". (I whispered to my zee…i hope Im worth all that and deserve that from you my son)
Let’s get well soon, both of us!!